Fakin' The Funk

Ok, ladies.  We have heard all about your drama.  It’s time for some words from the stronger sex.  With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, one of my boys needs to tighten up his game.  On paper, he has it all—well educated, successful, fun-loving and adored by many.  However, in person, this brother takes James Brown’s call to “Make it funky, now!” a little too serious.  The hand tailored Italian suits cannot disguise the fact that his breath is kickin’ like Tae Bo!  And brotherman did not just finish an onion burger—he could have just had a chaser of mouthwash, but it’s no match for the Dragon. 

Do I tell Lover Boy that Altoids are NOT doing the job?  How can I spare the air and his feelings?  Help a brother out.

Truly,

Sir Nose De Void of Funk

Comments

[L. Hardaway]

Sometimes you just have to be frank, but sensitive. I dealt with a similar problem with a friend that I cared about by asking him if he had a cavity that needed attention. After he replied, I explained that his breath smelled like that and that maybe he should see a dentist to check it out. I tried to speak on it in as clinical a way as I could, so it wouldn't sound like a putdown. Bad breath can be a medical issue. Or maybe he needs to refine his daily oral hygiene by flossing. If you're his friend, you're on. Tell him!

[Listerine]

I think this is a layup. A quick, "Yo bro, ya need to drop a mint or two," on 2 separate occassions should do the trick. I can't imagine that he wouldn't appreciate it.

[Furious Styles]

Many times halitosis is a symptom of diet and you should encourage the brother to eat better. A real caring woman would see this as an opportunity to cook and cater to her man.

[Heidi Wells]

I knew someone once that even after being told that his breath was kickin' did not address the problem. Maybe your friend is wiser. There are nice ways to frame something so sensitive...make it humorous, offer this guy some gum, or just take him to the side and start off with, "you know I'm your friend...and I have something to tell you..." If he's your friend, he should understand AND be grateful!